Damn, I fucked up, OP! I swore that the first word was On and not One, hence the direction I opt to take this. Please consider changing One to On so that at the very least the ongoing story makes sense. With that, here's my next contrib.

One day A, God created Beve. Beve was not, I repeat, not a man of God, but a nonbeliever raised by the moron who hard-carved wood