Satoshi never premined/instamined/fastmined/etc. a single Bitcoin.

He publicized his system to essentially 100% of the people in the world who could possibly understand it, worked with a few of them to clean up his code before launch, announced the launch I think a week ahead of time (not sure of the time period, maybe I'm wrong here), and then everyone had years to mine it using ordinary computers before it even had any monetary value whatsoever, with no guarantee it ever would. Of course, the monetary parameters of the system were "set in stone" (his words), were never changed after launch, and the actual mining has turned out to match the schedule stated in the white paper quite closely.

The suggestion of even the slightest similarity between that experience and DRK is ridiculous and insulting, not only to Satoshi but to the intelligence of anyone reading it.

You guys are in good company though, the Bytecoin scammers who ninja-premined 82% of the coins on their system tried the Satoshi Defense too. Right around the time they were claiming that Bytecoin was created by aliens.