When reading all this I ask myself how can the average non-technical user ever store bitcoin safely ?
You would almost crawl to the necessity of a trusted party to store your keys.
Simply create a normal encrypted wallet with Bitcoin Core, Electrum or Armory and don't go messing around with private keys or paper wallets. Back it up and use a strong unique password.
I'm going to post a guide that will explain how to set up a very secure and very simple hot/cold storage system. It's not hard at all.