No, the source of mistrust is the fact that you masterbated to the thought of having sex with my friends. That's the source of mistrust for me.

I have wondered, when you did pleasure yourself to the thought of other men, where did you do it at? Did you at least not do it in our bed? The most intimate place between us. Or have their been other times you have thought about a sexual fantasy while in our bed?

Was there ever a time you masterbated, so since you were already satisfied, you did not want to have sex with me or bother trying?

The reason I don't trust you is because I know there will never be a day in your life where you will ever come clean on your own. As we both know, the only reason you did was because you thought you were about to be exposed anyways.

Especially now that you did come clean, your mind will do everything it can to not repeat it again. And I know that.

You told me over and over you have a very vivid mind. I can't imagine what that's led to vs what you have only told me.

I don't trust you became you because sex with you has always been a desire of mine with you. And instead of being comfortable with me, you were more comfortable with thinking about others, or even strangers.

I almost copied your dad on this so he would know why we split. I have a feeling he know something about this and this would strike home for him.

So yes, there is a constant mistrust there. Maybe subconsciously I am making you distrust me so you feel the same way? Not sure.

But it all boils down to one thing. Morals.

Your moral integraty is not strong enough to make you come clean on your own. See with every person, they always split one of two ways.

Either their moral integrity wins out, even if it puts them at risk, so they do the right thing.

Or, the persons self preservation is higher, so if it poses to great risk for them, they will something to protect themselves, even if they know it's wrong.

Your the second. You will do what it takes to make sure you don't have to feel risk or be uncomfortable. Even of it means lying, or avoiding.

This is why trust is a issue.