Thats exactly right, I don't you or the entire universe verifying my transactions, retarded.
They're not "your" transactions, they belong to the network which is why they have any value at all.
"You" have a private key to control certain addresses on that network - addresses which are anonymous and which do not compromise your privacy as long as a reasonable level of fungibility and untraceability is maintained (as described above).
It's the publicly documented veracity of the network that gives your private key its value. The reason I've pressed this point is because I don't agree with Monero followers constantly spamming every available opportunity with the idea that "cryptography" in the public blockchain is the god given solution to fungibility simply by making the blockchain invisible. That may have some meaning from a cryptographic network perspective but is just totally misleading propaganda from a monetary point of view. It's not hiding anything from the "NSA", it's denying accountability to the network users - the very people who's interests it purports to support.