Honestly I am very confused I don't know what to belive anymore. Transaction spamming, bitcoin XT, not trust incoming transactions until they have ~30 confirmations plus fork here and fork there. So confused 
Yes, I agree. Very confusing.
My understanding is as follows:
1. There is some consensus to raise the blocksize limit. Something like "2 weeks after 75% of the hashing power signs a message"
to accept X MB blocks, Bitcoin core will update to do that. I'm not sure where we are in the process. But if you look at
a lot of the recent blocks, many are close to the 1MB, but not over, so it clearly hasn't happened yet.
2. There has been transaction stress tests but they haven't slowed down Bitcoin that much, except to push us against
the 1MB limit which are close to anyway. The current spam rules are ok.
3. There was a recent blockchain fork due to SPV mining, which there is no good proposal for right now
to my knowledge, which can make incoming transactions more risky to accept, so if you're not running
your own node, it is suggested to wait 30 confirmations to make sure you're not relying on a faulty SPV.
This is unfortunate, but hopefully can be remedied at some point in the near future.
That's just my limited perspective take on it. Someone more knowledgable should confirm/correct this.