I feel this whole blocksize drama is just what it is: drama. It aint gonna happen.
If they fork, the old/original version will come out as the one with the most
value (as in longest
valid chain, and as opposed to spammed/centralized/etc chain).
Probably there will be some adjustment time considering difficulty and the hashrate being divised, but Bitcoin 'original' can only triumph in the end.
Plus we get to loose all them ph0rking n00bs with their beloved companies, government and frappucinos.. ergo much much value

I am not convinced by your argument. It would be more convincing if you tried to rebuttal the arguments that have already been presented.