Just buy some bitcoins and move out of that shithole when we've reached the moon.
Now that's a whole other can of worms mate. Cant move.
I have a bunch of suggestions, but I'm pretty sure they're all illegal.
Should we take this conversation to Tor and start a dog shipping to north Korea revolution?
Why waste them sending them to Korea?
Dogs are great with a little kimchi over a bed of rice. Bbq dog knot is a delicacy.