Moronic memes won't make your case any better. Blockstream is trying to own Bitcoin by calling everything else an 'Alt'.
You have no humor which tells me something. Anyhow, Blockstream never really called everything else an "alt". You're really confused, or you've been deluded by people spreading propaganda or it is because of something else. You're confusing Blockstream with theymos in this case.
Large blocks are needed, necessary and prudent.
Large blocks are not needed right now. We need a increase in transaction capacity. This does not mean that we need to increase the block size necessarily. Segwit will do just fine for now.
Blockstream is a private company trying to cripple blockchain so people will buy their solution. They've got to be stopped!
Sidechains are open source, LN is open source and free to use. What's your point here exactly? You're not buying anything here.
Please avoid ad hominem, propaganda and baseless accusations against anyone. One could argue that Gavin is corrupted by the CIA, but it is best to avoid these things when there's no proof.