from coinbase:
"You will receive your bitcoin once the bank transfer completes. Usually this is within four business days (note, not calendar days). Well send you an email when your bitcoins arrive."
That is past christmas.
clearly i should have known that it would take ~2 weeks to get anything done.
This problem is all on the dollar/bank side. Try buying something online with a check or wiring money from one bank to another. It takes many days. Bitcoin transactions take hours, not days. Also, while credit card, debit card, and paypal transactions may be instantaneous, they also cost 3% or more.