Why am I an atheist?
Because God caused you to not believe so that you will not repent and He will destroy you in hell.
Usually, I simple ignore all comments like yours, since they are irrelevant. But I'm going to open an exception.
According to your "loving" god, I won't be destroyed in hell rather I will "burn" there alive for all eternity (Matthew 25:41; Jude 1:7; Mark 9:43; of course, especially on this issue there are many different inventions: my text, point 5).
Furthermore, the only natural meaning of Exodus 20:5; Exodus 34:7; Deuteronomy 5:9 and Numbers 14:18, is that also my sons, my grandsons, my great-grandsons and also their children, will burn eternally in hell also, only because of me, no matter how good and religious they are.
But as you write, it was god that "made" me like this, I'm just "following his plan" for me, therefore he is guilty for my sins, including my disbelieve in him (my text, point 7). God would burn in hell for eternity too if he followed his own rules.
Still on burning in hell, I'm going to quote an interesting (religious, even if heretic) Spanish writer, Miguel de Unamuno:
"And I must confess, painful though the confession be (...) [that] descriptions of the tortures of hell, however terrible, never made me tremble, for I always felt that nothingness was much more terrifying. He who suffers lives, and he who lives suffering, even though over the portal of his abode is written "Abandon all hope!" loves and hopes. It is better to live in pain than to cease to be in peace. The truth is that I could not believe in this atrocity of Hell, of an eternity of punishment, nor did I see any more real hell than nothingness and the prospect of it." (Tragic Sense Of Life, 1913, III - The Hunger of Immortality: https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/14636).
Religion can't scare an atheist. Our own conclusion condemns us to a certain destiny of eternal nothingness even worst than most versions of hell and that didn't make us retract it.
Here is the mistake in the thinking of Spanish writer, Miguel de Unamuno. Few people understand how deeply our souls and spirits are embedded within the core existence of the universe. Spanish writer, Miguel de Unamuno was among those who don't understand.
The core existence of the universe includes the dimensions, the parallel universes, the intelligence of the universe, and all time. In addition, there are probably many more things that are included that people haven't yet found out about.
The point? The destruction of the universe and the attached souls is a far greater happening than people understand. There is no such thing as simple death. There are only two points about the hereafter. Either, be removed from this universe and do not die, or go down with the collapse and dissolution of all space and time, to which your soul and essence is connected at its core.
