If "there is never total consensus," then you will never "reach consensus." That's just the way life is. Especially when no one even agrees on what "consensus" means 
You can blame the disruptors for this. Bitcoin was fine before the block size debate and nothing has changed since.I think it is about time this debate ends.
I don't think that it will end anytime soon.I don't think it should be compared to a civil war though, it is not the major community who is rising against the leaders, it is more the leaders fighting eachother.
Maybe a restructuration of the ecosystem is due. These 'leaders' should not have this much influence.It does prevent the growth of bitcoin in my opinion, so a decision has to be made, preferably one that does not take into account the side businesses some of them are involved with.
A decision has been reached, Segwit. The 'forkers' are just causing unneeded trouble at this point (see /r/btc).