So as he title states I'm completely new to mining. I've read a few FAQs and walk throughs about how to get started and what is the best pool to join and all that. I've registered at deepbit and I'm trying to use GUIminer as i can't really figure out how to use the CMD line miners. So here is my problem:

On my laptop (HD5870) this is what happens - I click start mining and it says "Shares 0 accepted 1 Stale/invalid" then after a couple seconds it says "Value error too many values to unpack" and just stays like that. I downloaded and installed OpenCL 2.8 64bit (apparently 2.1 works best for my card? i just couldnt find it) before i started as well. I've been on Google for the past 2 hours almost and really cant find a solution for this.

My desktop (GTX 560 Ti SLi - and i know nVidia isn't preferred for mining im just trying to get it working) is even worse - I hit start mining and it does absolutely nothing.

On my desktop and laptop I've tried making new miners and everything and doing what i can understand but i still have no luck. Does anyone have any ideas?