A good shitcoin is as rare as a conversation on this forum. Threads are usually just a list of folks opinions rather than valid argument. Anyhow, here is my opinion on what makes a good Altcoin.

The Devs need to get paid in USD or BTC.
Devs usually get paid in the shitcoin they are producing so not only do they have to dump it to get real money to live on, they have to sing its praises regardless whether they believe in it or not.
We have all had jobs involved in products or services that we have no real faith in but, we have to keep quiet about it all because we need to make a living. I once had a job making icecream and I don't even like icecream. I just thank God that they didn't pay me in the retched stuff. I would have had to go selling it after work to get real money. So if the Devs got paid in USD or BTC, they wouldn't have to promote it as falsely as they do.

Also, you need people to "big up" your coin.  It's better if you own a media outlet or a forum to do this.  Vitalik owned Bitcoin Magazine so it was easy to make positive reviews on his Ethereum. You have to spend far more time, money and resources on PR and advertising than you do on developing. You need to create loads of hype before you even release the coin.

Then you need a private slack channel so you can conspire with the exchange owners to put up false buy/sell walls in the market depth when needed.   

Finally, you need a bunch of people that think they will be rich if they hold on to it for long enough (sadly that's the easiest bit).

This is what you need for a good altcoin but remember, Devs only make money at the start unless you stick a 40% tax on the mining for the first 4 years.

I believe that the devs, forum owners, exchanges and media people are all in it together and as soon as the income starts to fail, they put out another shitcoin. This is why we have so many!


Edit: Oh I nearly forgot, a good gimmick helps.  What about something like PizzagateCoin? All good darknet pedo sites will be accepting it as payment.