Thanks to everyone who responded to my question. Now I know I can sell straight back to Coinbase without having to be considered a money transmitter or any of those confusing terms.

As far as taxes are concerned, I'll pay my fair share to the best of my ability. But what I've read, btc taxes can be confusing because the IRS is making rules up as they go. They should have just let the bitcoin ecosystem evolve naturally before rushing in greedily for their piece of the pie.