You should understand that I'm not of the type who can be easily swayed
Which makes it worse considering that your whole knowledge is completely false.
First of all, the issue you describing has nothing to do with what you have been claiming. This is not the problem that Bitcoin is facing now, i.e. high fees and slow confirmations. This is a entirely different story. So you may want to think twice before calling someone an idiot (personally, I don care, I ask you to check your reasoning first). But this is in fact irrelevant, and you can discard this point altogether. What is of real value here is that Lightning Network is set to specifically address the issues mentioned, so it can't possibly encounter them if it is created to solve them. As simple as that
Bullshit. Trying to make up excuses so that you don't look like an idiot.
If a single payment channel is enough for me to transact with everyone, why would each user be required to open a payment channel, and why would it require block space at that?
On its own, LN solves nothing and requires block space (i.e. bigger blocks starting with Segwit) to enable a high number of users to use it. Now, I actually would prefer franky1 to pop in. His, often flawed but sometimes correct, views are much superior than your Utopian fantasies.