Mental riddle for everyone: count my deposits and withdrawals and tell me where is all the money
It is, in large part, a trading game. You traded (and likely otherwise played) badly, resulting in losses.
Some of those losses have been paid by you. Some of them you walked out on, after relying on your (previous) stature and reputation to play on credit.
Losses and bad play do not excuse shorting deposits that you owed and owe, which is what you did.
It's like when you walk away from the poker table and all your money is in front of the guys who won - it's there money now, you lost.
Exactly this. You bought chips on credit, used them to play, and lost. Then you took it to the next level by buying back some of those chips with
very specific payment terms and punitive interest that served to (falsely) convey confidence and encourage other players to not only stay in the game, but pour more money into it on account of your assurances.
Now pay for your chips.