The real vouch we can accept is tits with nipple and write your username on your tits using lipstick.
Then we got a deal here.

Lipstick makes a mess. This isn't ML. lol
But I'll make a clever sign with My username / date this weekend.
Or if y'all want to start up a poll, a pic with My holding any two (common) household objects? Like a TV remote and an apple?
Just some thoughts.
