Satoshi, bitcoin is extremely volatile and run by organizations now, not the people. There's constant forks such as Bitcoin Cash and other garbage that shows just how jokey the coin is. The only thing worthwhile is the blockchain itself and I honestly believe this was not meant to function as a method of payment, but as a method of storage(Bitcoin's constant dramatic price changes, good and bad, show this)
My resolution? Dump all your bitcoins on the biggest exchanges and destroy the currency, then start over.
Have you ever read Bitcoin's whitepaper? It seems like you're massively uninformed regarding a lot of topics that surround cryptos and blockchain. I'd start by doing that before asking for satoshi to dump his coins, lol.