Cool, I get it, the future is going to be great. But in the meantime, I need access to my money, and the wallet is broken (Linux build).

Could you please provide me with a copy of the blockchain so I can access my funds?

Like all I need is for you to .tar.gz and upload the blockchain

On my workstation with 32GB RAM and in i7 + SSD, I'm getting nowhere.
On my VPS, I'm getting:

EXCEPTION: St9bad_alloc      
std::bad_alloc      
8bit in ProcessMessages()  

Edit:
I'm suck at block:     "blocks" : 1010218,

First person to upload the blockchain, and provide their 8bit address, gets 60 - 8bit tokens from me. I'll post the TX ID here.