So in order for me to get my merit up I have to wait until others give the smerit to me or at least hope that other memeber want to share some merit??? I'm lost.
Yes, you would have to attain 250 sMerits from other users for you to progress to hero member rank, users are most likely to give merit to the posts which are more constructive, useful and helpful to the community, maybe you can start working towards that direction.