Again more philosophical talk, not something I enjoy...
Ok, if it's so simple...
your god is not real.
...
The whole idea of god is... contradictory.
...
So I guess I just proved god is not real, right?
I have laid out my own worldview for you in some detail. I have handed you my looking glass if you will and given you a chance to examine it.
I find the picture to be crystal clear but maybe for you the image is out of focus or you find yourself simply unable to use it.
You can certainly choose to reject the Abrahamic faiths but that is not a conclusion but a beginning. Having thrown away the looking glass that got you and your ancestors to where you are today you are now wandering blindly and in great need.
The logical result of gutting ones foundational principles without accepting a replacement ideology is incoherence and self-contradiction. Overall that is not a good place to be.
Your task now is to find Truth to the best of your ability, and your dislike of philosophy is going to make the process more difficult for you. What you need is to build a fully integrated and coherent worldview for yourself and accomplishing that is no small task.
I would recommend against Nihilism. I have examined that road and do not think it leads anywhere good. Maybe look at Bhuddism. They usually focus on compassion, understanding, and limiting human suffering and simply avoid the question of God. That is a far better approach then incoherence or illogical denials.
Dalai Lama Speaks - What About God?
https://spectrumofbeliefs.blogspot.com/2009/04/dalai-lama-god-what-about-god.html?m=1Finally, at the end of his talk, questions were invited from the audience. A man said, "I understand Buddhism does not believe in God. What is your opinion about God? Does God exist or not?". His Holiness laughed, grabbed the hands of the two spiritual leaders on each side of him, lifted them in the air, fixed his gaze upon the audience, and said emphatically, "God exists or God does not exist. Leave it for us. Your task is to learn how to live peacefully."
I don't like philosophy because it's not practical. Philosophy is like science but without experiments or evidence. Look at old school philosophers, they believed in really crazy things sometimes, people too. I don't blame them, obviously the information and knowledge they had at that time was limited and some of the conclusions they arrived at were somewhat logical at the time but they were wrong many times about many things, mainly because all they used was ''thought'' and a lot of assumptions.