Oh boy, it is very apparent you haven't been working with your counselor. I know the mommy and daddy things that happened to you when you were little have caused many issues in your life. It's time to address them head on, forgive, learn, grow and become a person we can like. I know this is a crypto forum however, if you keep shitting the bed at our party we can start here. I will step away from the party and work with you. All the tech is working for us anyway. Your life is more important than crypto.