So many of these type of posts.
Essentially an attempted 'insightful' post from someone who pretends they don't want merit, but actually does, and disguises it by singing the praises of the merit system that has seen them receive zero merit. How original.
I'm glad that you marked my originality. And my message is my confession. I still really want to get a merit. But this is not a problem for me, it's just a fact.