I can fix this forum in about 15 seconds in a completely unbiased and trustworthy way. I just need access to the server's power cord 

If this were a vote I'd vote for pugman's alts. Does anyone have a link to the latest post reporting stats? I would imagine Welsh and LoyceV are up there near the top. Shouldn't be any harm in assigning them to some shitposting megathread board, perhaps for a trial period.