Bitcoins can be printed on paper, copied, bound, copyrighted, and self-published. One could then tear out pages and transmit them. Shall we outlaw books?
Even better solution: Engrave your bitcoin key on a bullet! You can defend your bitcoin under the 2nd Amendment, and have another nifty way to transmit it over long distances
(I'm actually not a gun nut, nor even own a gun, but the "gubming gonna get you" comment made me think of this)