Well
http://www.bitcoinpayflow.com/ certainly does look interesting and I may well use this.
And I do hear what a couple of people have said about doing things the wrong way: fair comment. But are there other avenues to explore if I was going to do this on site myself ?
One of the purposes here is NOT to have to trust 3rd parties with my cash flow.
If you want to do it yourself and not trust anyone, then you have to also not use a web hosting company (who you are trusting with your cash flow if they have access to your servers). You would need to get hardware yourself and then have it
colocated somewhere so that you are the only one with access to the servers. At that point, you *could* install bitcoind on the servers yourself (since you are managing everything yourself).
But that is a massive hassle and is the reason why payment gateways are worth using. It's not all that different than if you accept credit card transactions and use a credit card payment processor or gateway. in fact it better because you only are trusting the bitcoin payment processor for an hour and it takes much longer to receive funds from your credit card payment processor.