@azkielt,
Its kinda really hard cause you have a lot of questions that was never answered. That might be the reason why you have that kind of perspective. On my part, there are also alot of things that science still can't explain even if we say that its evolving it is still has a lot of holes to fill. I am also aware of the possibilities that it may not be able to fill those holes.
That is my perspective which also leads me thinking that there should be a start and created everything
So, you believe in the "God of the Gaps".
If you don't know how something happened, an intellectually honest position is to say: "I don't know how it happened.", not to invent an answer.
If you do, your epistemology goes out of the window.