Turns out someone called Ronald Keala Kua Maria beat CSW to this particular nonsense stunt around 3 years ago - fill in a form, provide no evidence, and have your application registered. I don't remember anyone making a big deal of it then. I wonder why?
He has now been issued a fully vetted certificate of copyright by US Government Copyright office. This can not be contested unless you have standing so this is it, game over, checkmate.
By your logic, Ronald Keala Kua Maria is definitively Satoshi Nakamoto. Checkmate.