You are right. I wasn't sick at all. I went to my wife's medicine cabinet and tried to swallow her opioid drugs. I swished the pills around in my mouth, but as hard as I did it, I couldn't swallow them, and they didn't even break down in my mouth saliva.

So, I thought I would put them back in the bottle for the wife. But I couldn't. As I washed my saliva off them, they dissolved in the sink water, and flowed down the drain.

Darnedest thing.