[...]
Yeah, I tweaked the voltages on the 2Pacs, but not the new. I guess I assumed there were different generations of NewPacs, since the chips are different colors. Evidently I was wrong. I'll swap over to a Pi4 then and see what results that yields.
[...]
Ah, that makes sense. I've seen the plateaus, yeah. And I've got them quite cool, don't have a temp laser but they're only slightly warm to the touch, average coffee is warmer.
[...]
I've got 2 fans on them, I'm confident it isn't a heat issue - one fan is top down, the other is angled in from the side. I love loading the OS off a flash drive, I'll give that a shot before I buy a pi

Thanks everyone.