As your a veteran troll I suggest you did what you did in April 2016 and not buy any. But if you must try Ionomy or get one of your acolytes to buy some for you on Bittrex Global.
Yes, I look with great pride at those 2016 bitcoins that I didn't spend on ION.
1 bitcoin since 2016: +1500%
ION vs BTC since 2016: -98.75%
Extraordinary garbage.