No, I believe you should not do that  Like what you said, it doesn't violate forum rules
This is about the ethical scope, we should not publicize private messages to the community. But it does not mean that it is not allowed, in some cases, users should publish the message to clarify the problem. In this case, it is absolutely allowed. A few other users have made private messages public when needed, Yahoo62278 is an example, he is transparent in the matters to be handled.
I think removing the tag would be more reasonable than the neutral change, you are looking quite stressed in personal messages  Let's think more comfortable in this case