Halfwits!  Stupid coon shits! Reference: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Me, I'm a chronic hard-on type of guy when markets start going haywire like this.  However this time I must confess that I'm impotent, since my bank account is not treating me well and thus I have no funds to buy bitcoin, stocks, or anything else that's taken a hit.  This is why it's always good to have a cash reserve.

Also: I haven't sold anything during this panic.  I'm not starving to death and I don't think I'm going to have to retreat to the bunker anytime soon, so I didn't need to free up funds for that.  Tomorrow I'm expecting a zombie apocalypse due to a mutation of COVID-19, so it's not going to matter anyway.  Bring it on, baby!