I read it twice to try understand all but still think I did not get it all like what private keys you mean? and from what you are saying I should go with the video and use only the wallet.dat file not the other 9,7gb files found in bitcoin map ?
Correct... the only part of the old data you
really need is the wallet.dat file. This is the wallet data file that contains all the private keys you need to be able to access your bitcoins.
and why do you think I cant start this wallet? cause I made a copy to the 1tb external HDD and what I remember it was an .exe file I saved but now I only find pieces or actually surprised at those 9,7 GB of data what is that about on first picture my wallet.dat is only 88kb big so whats using 9,7gb and is there a way of getting the real wallet somewhere saved on my HDD to click exe and it will open up with a password.
The 9.7gb's will be "blockchain data" that Bitcoin Core (likely called bitcoin-qt back when you created this) had downloaded. This blockchain data consists of the "raw" block files downloaded from other bitcoin nodes.
i don't understand why the wallet exe is not found.
Because it would appear you have backed up the old Bitcoin Core
data directory... and not the actual
application directory...

On Windows, applications are generally installed to "C:\Program Files" (and/or "C:\Program Files (x86)")... this folder generally contains just the application itself (ie. the "exe" file)... and any support libraries etc. The "User Data" is generally stored in "AppData\Roaming\APPLICATIONNAME"... which for Bitcoin Core on Windows 10 will be "C:\Users\YOURUSERNAME\AppData\Roaming\Bitcoin"
In any case, as mentioned above... the ONLY thing you need from the old backup, is the wallet.dat... that is the file that will contain all your private keys... and these private keys are what you need to be able to create/send bitcoin transactions.