The mere fact that you refer to them as cryptocoins tells me that you're ready to start giving sound market analysis. 

-you don't own any "cryptocoins"
-you have a computer science degree from Stanford University

Do you really expect a different reaction from us? I have no problem with people giving honest criticisms to cryptocurrencies, but this is obviously not the forum in which to be doing it. I would think the developer forum would be more to your intellectual liking. Traders here are generally aware of how they work, inside and out, are aware of the risks, and have heard it all a hundred times before.

If you're going to post here, get your damn feet wet instead of shouting SHARK from the beach. You know how to swim, it'll be ok.