after reading this while bitcoin at ATH.. i feel like suicide again.

I started buying bitcoins in 2014. gradually converting all my life savings to bitcoin (~90%) of it.
at first i played at just-dice and everything went very well.

I was using script bot to play.
I use martingale. i know everyone say this strategy will lose big. But i play at various places without losing big and was actually winning tiny amount, just-dice, primedice, coinroll.. etc

then came 999dice (2014) at that time not many report about 999dice, I switch to 999dice bcoz of the speed it seems to roll faster there. and the odds.
the bots were doing quite well at first. but end up losing 40+btc

I almost commit suicide. I know it sound silly but u wont know wat it feels like to lose everything and have a family to feed. Its that sudden spike in suicidal thought.
Really really suicidal.
I bought more btc with my remaining savings to try to win back from other dice site, it was the last fight before i end everything (life). I know it sound silly, i didnt know what else i could do.
Played awhile, knew i can never win it back, sold all remaining bitcoin and never tough bitcoin again. Its a wound that will never heal.

Recently saw news headlines about btc at all time high, so i decided to take a look again. and i saw alot of post about 999dice scam.
The suicidal feeling is back. I thought i lost because of my bad luck. But now i know the game was rigged. I don't know what to say.
really speechless.
40btc is a big sum in today dollar.

this is just crazy. all these time i always think that my luck was bad. Wasnt expecting this. its a totally different feeling.
Im glad that i didnt die by suicide.  to find out about this.

its really sad. and thx for uncover this.