the pornography I've produced is, in fact, free, and not some sort of bizarre sex scam.
I had no idea you'd produced any pornography--where have I been? Must be my lack of sex drive or something. But hey, as long as it's between two consenting adults, who am I to judge?At the risk of causing additional disappointment, my arse is not in fact available for rent, not even in exchange for merits, despite what you may have heard about what really goes on in the Merit Cycling Club, where any rumoured foxhole shenanigans are just a free bonus. 
I'd like to confirm that I've never been touched inappropriately as a result of my participation in Foxpup's cycling club, nor have any animals been harmed. It might look mysterious to the outsider, but there's really no shenanigans happening as far as the club is concerned--not even merit abuse, much less anything more sinister. Check my merit-giving record and you'll see that I'm not swapping merits with anyone else on the team (I've got avatars blocked, so I don't even know who I'm cycling with tbh), nor has Foxpup given me tons of merits like he used to do since I joined. He's a stand-up [insert gender word here] as far as I'm concerned.I still don't see where all this drama is coming from. It started with a death threat?