So many 3GB and 4GB GPUs can't mine Ethereum anymore due to this arbitrary and bullshit DAG file thing.

There is a simple solution.  Just reduce it!  Just clip off the first 2GB of the file that probably just sits there unused, filling your ram chips with unneeded data.

Let's get it done, Ethereum managers!  I see no good reason why the file needs to be so damn big.  To block ASICs, okay, but you don't need 4 damn GB to do that!!!