Everything you know about tinfoil is WRONG!

Your reptilian overlords have secretly taken foil off the Tin Standard under the cover of hushed-and-largely-forgotten post-WWII American economic collapse.  Ha, we replaced it with worthless aluminum fail.

Unlike genuine tinfoil, inferior ersatz aluminum fail is powerless in protecting your weak minds from D-sigma orgone radiation in the 24-36nm spectrum, our cerebromutagenic radiation of choice since the early 1950s.

Best of luck, Humans!