I risked more than I could loose
Fun is only limited when you are still playing and still has the funds but the moment you lose everything and all the money that you cannot afford to lose, I don't think its still fun to gamble. Gambling is only fun if you are always in control and that you have to be discipline as that's the only way to manage the risk effectively.
unfortunately, not many gamblers can stick to the rule about using funds that you can afford to lose.
and yes, should move to this gambling discussion board
btw, the OP becomes a poet sharing his personal experience in gambling.
maybe he can find a job in the poetry business instead of gambling.