It is pretty much impossible to follow your story, but it all sounds very fishy. What is the name of site you are using? Is it this site? What is the "escrow list" you are referring to? Have you used it before? Have you traded with this person or this escrow before?
(the same person they recommended to escrow it).
This alone is enough to give me pause. An escrow should be mutually agreed. If one party demands you use a specific escrow, then that can be a sign of a scam attempt.