My server reports pretty much everything as incoming, I get a better idea by running a client at home, anything that shows up in the Peers tab is a listening node.

If your client is hosted on your home network, it likely won't be accessible externally unless your router supports NAT/UPNP and you have configured the router to enable UPNP for the machine running the client.

Belt and braces - have upnp=1 in the config (or rather ensure that you don't have upnp=0 in the config - which you don't seem to have).

Cheers

Graham