I think the underlying cause is that wherever you have a group of people interacting with each other (even when this is only two people), you have a situation where each participant in the interaction wants different things. The outcomes that you as an individual want are 'right', and those you don't want are 'wrong'. Your own 'right' and 'wrong' will differ from other people's 'right' and 'wrong'.
In this situation, for Alice, the idea of Frank being with Marry is 'wrong'. It doesn't really matter what in her mind the 'right' outcome is, whether she would like to be with Peter but also stay with Frank at the same time, or whether she doesn't want anyone to be with Frank, or whether she just doesn't want her friend to be with him. It's enough for Alice that Frank being with Marry is 'wrong'. She has not reached this definition of 'wrong' through any logical reasoning, it's simply an emotional position. What she then does is to try to seek any reason she can find that might support this conclusion. She then decides that Marry's action is not compatible with the rules of friendship... because this is a reason that supports her desired conclusion, that Marry+Frank=wrong. Alice's reasoning is superficial and inauthentic. Her 'reason' for Marry's action being bad is not a reason at all, it's simply a mental prop to support a pre-established conclusion. It happens all the time. Consider for example the painful logical contortions that creationists will go through in order to deny the truth of evolution through natural selection.
Yes, I understand and agree with principle that
good and
bad are terms we use to describe our subjective point of view. And this point of view may be based on our actual emotions only. What I consider as pathological is the human need to force own opinion to others. It may looks OK, because it is totally natural to assert yourself at the detriment of others, but I am not sure if it is OK to do it by force without using rational arguments.
You were talking about Alices's pre-established conclusion coming from emotional position that Mary's actions are wrong. Where does this specific conclusion come from? What is the origin of such a judgement?