If I die (let's be honest, that will probably happen), would my wife or family get my coins? What if they don't know my passwords/private key?
they can if you will make ways or idea how they can open it once you're gone.. If you have large amount of
BTC as of now then as soon as possible make backups and find a safe place where you can hide your private keys.. And then a notes incase what will happen to you. Of course its up to you which place you want to hide it because you're the one who know them well.
That may be one good option. IMO in everyone life there are people who are very close to you and for whom we work day and night. They may be your parents, wife, children, siblings etc. Better give them recovery materials in case anything happen to you, so that all you hard work is not lost on the darkness of blockchain.