I have been registered ahead of you and feel ashamed now, perhaps lack time to do such quality posts or I am just a non-quality poster which is a reason now I am trying to encourage myself as you have said.
If you're not a good poster then I'm sure today you probably won't be able to merit much from 60 different users. I think you just need to be patient and do something better than beat yourself up while celebrating the success of other users. It is important to feel confident in your own ability to achieve something, even if it takes a long time.
Your merit to the next rank is less than 100, so it shouldn't be too much when you've managed to get 85% more so far. Less than 15% you will qualify for rank up to Hero, so don't be discouraged.