I just noticed this post and after reading through all of that, I have nothing but admiration for you.
Your will to be better is strong, strong enough to overcome the hurdles you've experienced up to this point; so, stay strong and keep being optimistic.
You are brave enough to share this story with us and inspire others with it.
I'm sure with your strong will and bravery, you'll get better in no time. Fight on brother.
You are what others may call a braveheart.