The main answer to your question lies in your post, which is to avoid centralized exchangers. And if you have to use an exchanger, then I would say that you can use Coinbase, Kraken, Binance, Kucoin, although currently no centralized exchanger should be trusted 100%, because 2022 has taught us a lot already through the  FTX And LUNA's incident, but of the four, Coinbase and Binance are currently the most reliable.
And for this, I will also suggest that all funds should not be kept in these centralized exchangers. Then I will say that the use of these centralized exchangers should be gradually reduced and decentralized in a direct way towards Peer to peer system. and #NOT_your_keys_NOT_your_Coin