But what will you do with the funds of your hot wallet? They will be lost ? 0.1 or 0.2 BTC is not an insignificant amount for many people on earth you know.
If you keep that much in a hot wallet, then its up to you to figure out how you want to leave it to your heirs. Simply telling your spouse about the location of your seed phrase back up would be my preference, but I also don't keep that much money in a hot wallet. I treat a hot wallet as I treat physical cash in my physical wallet, and I certainly don't wander around with thousands of dollars of cash in my pocket.
You advise against using any third party service, such as Google, but you hold Bitcoins in a closed source wallet not air gapped while you don't need it?
I have a variety of hardware wallets used for a variety of different reasons. Some single-sig, some multi-sig, some decoys, some are empty, etc.
Why not? I don't think most of women really care about that to be honest. They don't marry men because they hold or not bitcoins, fortunately.
I'm not arguing that you should be showing off your bitcoin to entice someone to marry you, but rather you probably shouldn't be basing your entire marriage on lies and secrecy from your spouse.