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You just did a great job not lending your cousin.If you feel that he/she will not pay you in the future then what's the reason why you lend money to him/her. Trust hasn't been there. It's like those banks where if you have a low credit score, they see you as untrustworthy therefore, they will not let you borrow.
Lucky for me, I didn't encounter that kind of scenario as well. Maybe because I'm good at keeping my assets, and I'm not sharing anything that's related to my money to anybody here (even to my own family
). Don't get affected if he doesn't talk to you anymore because after all, you see him as an untrustworthy person. If you are affected that much because of your decision, you can try and approach him and lend him a few dollars to at least build the trust. Like you said, it’s just like the banks. They would refuse anyone with a low credit score cause the person is not trusted enough to repay such loans.
I think you’re one of the lucky ones cause you haven’t had a relationship ruined cause of repayment of a loan. Money has divided a lot of people. I know.
I also think it’s great that you keep your finances personal and don’t go about sharing how much you’ve got in the bank to family and friends. Your finances are private matters and should be kept private. The only other person who could have access to your finances would be your spouse.
If friends and in some cases family know exactly how buoyant you are, they will come armed with the knowledge and feeling somewhat entitled asking for a loan that would probably be never paid back.
I also think keeping your own assets as a secret is a good thing to everyone. Family relationships are better kept based on trust, love and help without reward. I can give you a very different example other than my cousin's lending. I have mentioned in other thread that my closest friend lost his job a few months ago and I knew that he had been unemployed for over a year , plus his wife was hospitalized for two months. I felt so sorry to hear that and I immediately offered my help to lend him $5,000 without any time limitation to return. Why ? Because we have been best friends for decades and I know he can be fully trusted. You know what, he refused to take my money and said he would be okay. I know even to this day, he is still financially struggling to pay off debt but he never asked me for loan, simply because he cares about our friendship very much. Anyway, my money is always ready for him, whether now or in the future.